I BLOG WHEN I'M HAPPY

..and i don't when i'm not.

I noticed that my blogging decreased when i started university. Some might think this might be due to stress and heavy studying. But its not, because, looking back i realized that i didn't do alot. I didn't listen to the lectures, didn't watch the movies ( cuz basically i was studying film studies :/) and only did the obligatory papers. I hoped for my course to turn out better in the future, thats why i gave it a chance for the second semester. But it didn't get better. I even took some Lectures about Comics, and i didn't care about it at all. This depressed me so much, it made sad and angry and all out confused. I had not a bit of Passion for my course.

Thats why, i finally decided to stop.
I don't want to graduate leaving me with the feeling of not having learned something at all.

So here i am right now, sitting in front of my laptop writing emails to Advertising Agencies, asking for available Internship spots. Next Year, I am going to apply for design courses. Which is what i wanted to do ever since School. I just didn't go that way because i thought i was made for more, i was such an ego, i thought i had to go to University instead of "only" an art school.

Well fuck it i was stupid. I just want to feel happy with what i'm doing now.

And i feel incredibly happy and relieved about finally having decided what to do. Now i just need to proove my Mom and everyone else that i can do it.


So, to end my Sentitalk and to to excuse my absence from the Bloggasphere (sp??) i'll show you what i've been up to these last months  in a quick xiuxiu meit tu photocollage

1 + 2.Karneval | 3. playing with Makeup | 4. Doc Martens i got from Chani <3 | 5. before going to Düsseldorf | 6. Puris with Friends

 1. Makeup for the Beauty fair | 2. Daniela Katzenberger at the Beauty fair | 3. Cologne | 4. Mixtas | 5. Me

 1. Sushi with Boyfie | 2. Me & Daddy | 3. My new Hair & Mommy | 4. handmade B-day cake for mom | 5.Whats left of the cake

1. Dressing room at Divisoria | 2. Wicked Oreos | 3. Inuman on Mothersday | 4. Me & my Godchild Chloe | 5. Chloe Baby <3

The last set of pics were from the Philippines, we spontaneously flew over because my dear Uncle died. It was a very sad Trip, but i'm happy to have seen my family again.

If you still read this, well thanks for still checking out my blog. I may not be the hippest or most exciting person in the world to read about, but i still appreciate alot when people listen, or well..read what i have to say or want to show.

Thanks, till next post then.

The Japan Disaster

I practically spent my whole morning with CNN these past two days and remember how i catched myself cursing loudly when i saw the tsunami spreading through japan like lava or a thick black massive gooey kinda something. Seriously you probably all saw it too, its as if this something was like-eaating japan!

Now its up to Japan and the people and the rest of the world to fix this mess.
Its a good thing that Japan is such a developed contry that alot of it goes on smoothly.
From what i could gather from the news i mean. I excuse if this is not the case but to me it seems that the people who got evacuated and gathered together in the gyms and stuff seemed kind of...calm about the situation. I mean, i saw people read and be on the laptop and kids playing around. It seemed like... a train situation.
An then i thought that if it were some other country, a developing country or something, things would be wayyy more chaotic, panic would be all over the people causing ever more chaos.
And luckily, this does not happen in Japan.
Then again it may be that the japanese have always been prepared for earthquakes. (although this has been the strongest one that has hit japan)
But im still verrry worried about the Fukushima explosion and its possible after effects. I don't know much about nuclear science and that stuff so what i'm wondering about is how radioactive leakage might affect the people who get close to it.
Im suuuper scared about the damage beeing like the hiroshima nuclear victims. I don't know if thats possible, but they both got something to do with nuclear stuff so i thought it might. I just hope thats not the case.

And then of course this reminds me of the other tsunami incidents these past years, or even other natural disaster like Hurricane Katrina or something.
And thinking about it, thinking that its Mother Natures doing and not human mistakes makes me feel...weird like, im sad because theres nothing you can do against it, but on the other hand isn't the fact that there is noone particular to blame good?
Although me personally? I hate that, knowing that someone was at fault or if it were due to human mistakes, i dunno it kind of would make me feel safer because that would kind of proove that Mankind is in full control of the world.
But Mankind is not.

I could now get all philosophical here talking about Life, God, Destiny,Mother Nature or other higher beeings blablaa, but it would all come to the same conclusion anyways:
Sadly things do happen and its the way of life.

Lets all just pray or wish the best for Japan.
And for the other countries who are still in danger of beeing hit by the tsunami.
And thank god, thankyou thankyou thankyou for sparing the Philippines!!


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i know youre probably not in the mood for this but still, short life update:
Collected 10 points already! :D
Got myself cosmetic almond oil for that.
but now i'm back to 0 again ._.